Saturday, August 20, 2016

Sometimes you just have to follow your dreams.

So, I've tried blogging in the past. It's always ended up with me feeling like I'm giving the world too much information. There seems to be this constant struggle between the need for privacy and the need to share everything that I'm excited about in life (or not excited about, because I've never been the type of person to hide my struggles. I believe in honesty).

Anyways, our last few years have been an absolute whirlwind. We moved from Wisconsin to Oregon. We dealt with my husband's anxiety (which was no easy feat). We left our adult daughter in Oregon, and moved to Michigan. We've found more peace and happiness in our tiny rural Michigan house than we had EVER expected. We also found out that I have Multiple Sclerosis.

Wait, did I just say that? Yes. I've had this huge internal debate between "do I tell people and risk hurting my future, employment wise" and "do I keep everything internalized and not tell anyone at all"? Well, it's the first option. I fully recognize that someday, a future employer will google my name or my business, and they will find out that the myellin in my brain is disintegrating. *shrugs* They may choose to hire me anyways, they may choose not to. Whatever happens, will happen, but I don't want to hide anything about myself. Simply put, I just don't have that amount of energy in me to keep things hidden.

Although I've been struggling with my health for a little over 2 years now, MS still came as a huge shock to me. No one ever expects to hear that they have lesions in their brain. Quite honestly, it's terrifying. Life is terrifying though.

I was at a transitional point in my life. I had been MotherMoonPads for 7.5 years, and I was feeling really stagnant. I absolutely love what I do, but I'm a creature of change, and I've made over 50,000 MotherMoonPads at this point. I thought I wanted to transition into a career outside of the house, so I started substitute teaching. I very, very quickly learned that subbing was NOT for me. I loved the time I spent in the classroom, but if I was going to be a teacher, I would want to be a full time teacher. That won't happen without a masters degree, and I'm not at the point in my life where I want to go back to college and add another 20 grand (plus!). A few full time administrative assistant positions opened up, but the fact that I didn't even get an interview was a very clear sign that being in the school full time wasn't for me.

I spent the summer wallowing in the self pity that is MS. I felt myself go through all of the stages of grief. I had a whole lot of #NFG types of days. I NEEDED this time to allow myself to not fight. I needed to not focus on food. I needed to just be.

Then one day I woke up with a very clear vision that I needed to dive into what I've always wanted to do. I needed to stop being afraid of MS, and stop being afraid of failure.

I needed to open up a brick & mortar boutique that focuses on mama and baby, one that has a meeting space so I can start up breastfeeding, babywearing, cloth diapering support groups for our area (none exist!!). The next day I took my husband to check out the shop I wanted to rent, and called the owner. 2 days later, I met her, did a walk through, and she handed over the key. I was welcome to start the renovations immediately. A few hours later, I had a $5,000 business loan (yes, I'm opening a B&M with $5,000 total, did I mention I'm incredibly thrifty and hate debt?), and started ordering inventory. 2 days after that, I had the official lease signed. That's it, I'm committed and locked in for the next year!

Do I know anything about running a brick and mortar shop? NOPE. I've created one not so successful startup, and one very successful startup. I have a BA in Accounting. I have just enough common sense (haha!) and passion. I can totally do this.

I'm currently renovating the building by myself, but I hope to open September 15. The address is 7 Sanilac Rd, Sandusky, MI 48471. Come visit me if you're local!


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